Revenge of the Dorks
by mattressdemon
Summary: When Eddy decides to get revenge on Kevin by finding his secret weakness, he stumbles across something he didn't expect. Future Kevedd. Prompt from turtle-nerd! Co-written story. We do not own Ed Edd 'n' Eddy. Let us know if you liked it! :) Possible M rating in the future.


This was the moment he had been waiting for. He would impress all the girls with his suave singing voice. He'd been practicing this for weeks, readying himself for the Peach Creek High annual talent show. It'd been difficult to even get the spot on the show in the first place, and he had only done so thanks to the fact that Edd was friends with a boy in Science Society who was friends with a kid in the school government who was a friend with one of the school party organizers in the party club.

He greased back his dark brown hair and put his sunglasses on, grinning at himself and posing in the mirror behind stage while the acts went on. He was the last one. Ed and Double D were there to support him, of course, and he made an annoyed noise as Double D straightened the collar of his blazer. He batted at Double D's skinny wrist, "Hey, stop it, will ya?! Don't have a coronary. I look hot."

Double D's hands snatched back in response to Eddy's smack. With nervous, twitchy movements, he straightened the hat on his head. The hat, which had given him the name 'Sockhead', seemed permanently attached to him, and despite after almost two decades of wear, the hat was in meticulous form, as were most things in Double D's possession. Mumbling gently beneath his breath about untidiness, he was pushed aside by Ed, who wanted a closer look at Eddy.

"Wow, Eddy!" He proclaimed, one big hand grasping at the collar of Eddy's blazer. The fabric wrinkled under his touch. "You look cool!"

Ed's orange hair had been smartly combed only a few minutes ago, by Double D himself, but was now sticking up, as it was wont to do. "Messy, messy, messy." Edd's hands reached up to correct the issue, but Ed was moving too erratically, from side to side, for him to make any of the necessary corrections.

Eddy huffed out an amused noise at their actions, brushing at his jacket as Ed let go of it. "Come on, lumpy, you're messin' with my style. I got girls to impress." Eddy wouldn't have minded impressing them all, though he silently admitted there was on in particular he wished to impress over the others. A theatre student jogged up to them, giving the Eds - probably specifically Ed and Eddy, Ed for his smell and Eddy for Eddy - a disdainful look. "You're up in 60 seconds."

"It's my time to shine! Smell ya later!" Eddy perked up significantly more, and practically leaped towards the stage, waiting just behind the curtain for the boy playing a stupid instrument he couldn't recognize to stop hurting the girls' ears. He couldn't tell if he was pissed that he ruined the crowd's moods before he could get on, or if he was glad the boy had ruined their ears and now his singing would sound even better than before. When he walked past Eddy, Eddy skated out onto the stage, adjusting the mic down to his height. Annoying. The boy must have been abnormally tall.

The microphone blared out a blinding noise, and he winced as the crowd all together groaned in pain. Patting him, he cleared his throat. The music began to play, and he saw Double D and Ed settle on the sidelines, not bothering to sit down as he was the last performance anyway. He wouldn't hold it against them, but he did glare uselessly at a jock in the back who was standing. He was counting the beats to start singing, but as he opened his mouth and started, no sound came out of the microphone.

With the music so loud, especially on the stage, he couldn't even hear himself without the mic, and he kept trying. Growing increasingly frustrated, he began to beat the mic, only for no sound to come out. He yelled to ask who turned off the mic, but no one could hear him, and the crowd stared blankly at his bad mime show. Screaming in frustration, the sound just barely making it above the music in the slightest, he turned, looking past the curtain to demand what the problem was and why no one was fixing it! Didn't they know this was-

He froze, dead, staring at Kevin leaning against the wall just behind the curtain. He was smirking at Eddy, swinging the unplugged mic cord in his hand, and he saw him laugh, tossing it aside as he wandered backstage once more. Eddy ran after him, but a teacher who just arrived to investigate caught his shoulder, stopping him. "KEVIN!" He screamed, desperation and anger mingling together in a foray of Eddy's frustrations.

He heard someone on the stage now, announcing that the competition was over and that shortly the judges would crown the winners. The cash prize was slipping out of his fingers, as was any luck at impressing anyone - he'd just been made a fool of in front of the entire assembly of students. All because of that stupid shovel chinned prick!

"I think Eddy forgot how to sing, Double D," Ed commented to his friend, who was nervously biting at his nails, the tips chewed and torn. Double D knew Eddy would be quite cross, and from where they were, he had heard his exclamation of the one behind the musical mishap.

"Perhaps we should… go check on him, Ed." He offered gently to his big friend, corralling him towards the side hall that lead backstage. "Oh dear, oh dear…" Mumbled Double D, chewing fretfully at his pinky nail. He could almost feel Eddy fuming from backstage, and he winced when Ed, meaning well, yelled to Eddy, "Congratulations, Eddy!"

"Congratulations?! Do I look like KEVIN?!" He screamed the boy's name, unable to contain himself, and the teacher gave him a very disapproving look. "You three need to head out with the rest of the audience." He stated, firmly, and gave Eddy a little push towards Double D and Ed.

Eddy was fuming, his face flushed red in his anger and his hands clenched by his sides, jaw set hard. He didn't speak, a clear sign that he was beyond the edge, and simply shoved past Ed and Double D, heading to the exit door on the side. It wasn't like he was gonna win anyway - no prize cash, no girls, no nothing! As soon as the door to the auditorium shut behind him, he raged again, "AHHHUGHHH!"

Faithfully, Ed and Double D trailed after Eddy as he stormed out of the auditorium. Double D was thankful they left out the side door, near the portables, rather than out the main door where the masses of Peach Creek High were soon to be filtering out. Ed was still smiling serenely, though Double D watched it fall at Eddy's shriek of displeasure. "What's the matter, Eddy?" He asked, even as Double D knew by now that it was better to remain silent.

Eddy fumed silently, continuing onward with his clenched fists and jaw as he walked. The school day was over anyway, and they were heading down the sidewalk towards the cul de sac. Making an annoyed noise, he finally bitched when the cul de sac was in sight, "We have to get back at Kevin!"

"You have to admit, Eddy, he got you good!" chuckled Ed. Double D groaned, knowing Ed was sure to be hit for that, and he quickly moved between him and the aggravated Eddy.

"Now, Eddy…" He began, his voice going a little bit higher with his nervousness. "Surely we could just live and let live?" The simple fact of the matter was that Kevin always bullied Eddy, and Eddy always 'got him back'. It was a never ending cycle that stemmed from their elementary school days. There had even been times when Double D would assist Kevin in his torment of Eddy because sometimes… well, sometimes Eddy just deserved it. "Besides, he lives next door to you, Eddy."

"That's just a bunch of crap, Double D." Eddy groused, though he had calmed significantly from earlier. "We'll have to figure something out… Did you see what he did? He made a mockery of me in front of everyone!" And the money, and the girl… A strangled growl escaped his throat at the thought.

"Oh, Eddy." sighed Double D, worry creasing the skin around his eyes. "Surely Kevin's mischievous antics are not one to fret over. Perhaps we should instead go inside and watch The Snail from Gregon-47?"

"Forty-six, Double D!" Ed corrected him quickly, beaming largely. "Oh can we, Eddy? Please?" It was one of the B Horror movies he loved to watch so much, and Double D only had a… slight tolerance for such movies. Eddy groaned out, louder towards the end, his hands snapping up to tug at his hair.

"Fine." He offered, "Let's go watch your stupid movie. But I'm going to think of how to get back at Kevin…"


End file.
